What happens inside the counselling room?

The terms “counselling” and “therapy” doesn’t always evoke positive feelings in the Indian environment. It is like asking a failing student to undergo tuition in a subject with which he/she struggles. Many people in India keep it to themselves when they undergo depression or wish to improve certain life skills. The social stigma associated with meeting a Counsellor or undergoing mental health therapy is real. However, there is good news!

Counselling is no more a domain of the elites. For the past few decades, quality and affordable counselling is been made available both publicly, as well as privately, even to ordinary citizens. In this article, we will try to understand a little as to what goes inside the counselling room. Hopefully, this could help some to come out of their closet.

What is Counselling?

According to the American Counselling Association (ACA), counselling is defined as the process of building therapeutic relationships that help individuals reach goals in their mental health, education, and/or careers. Hence, the primary goal of counselling is to stroke insight and promote positive personality growth & development. Experienced Counsellors and Psychotherapists generally avoid the mistake of offering quick solutions or advice. They would rather help the Counselee(s) develop different viewpoints or healthy thinking. Moreover, they help the Counselee see the pros and cons of their old and/or new decision.

The Counselling Process

Contrary to what many people think, counselling doesn’t look like a patient lying in a dimly lit meditation room, where they are asked to close their eyes and forced to imagine something from their childhood. Yes, Hypnotherapy is one form of therapy, which is suggested as a treatment plan in some cases. However, there are many more effective and evidence-based therapies like CBT, REBT, DBT, ACT, etc., which a certified Psychotherapist would administer on a case-to-case basis. So, what actually goes on inside the counselling room?

1. First, the Counsellor and the Counselee(s) sit on a chair or a couch—facing each other—at an arm’s length away.
2. The Counsellor then tries to build some rapport with the Counselee by making him/her feel comfortable and respected.
3. Next, the Counsellor gently nudges the Counselee to share their current circumstances and feelings surrounding the issue for which they need counselling or therapy.
4. After understanding a fair amount of details about the Counselee and his/her issues through active listening and observing their body language, the Counsellor throws some light on their current circumstances, cognitive distortions and future possibilities.
5. And once the Counselee is aware of where they are vis-vis where they ought to be, the Counsellor along with the Counselee decides on a suitable intervention or therapy plan (depending on the complexity of the case, the interventions can run from one to many sessions) to reach the desired goal(s).
6. Finally, the Counsellor empowers and encourages the Counselee to execute the solution he/she has developed and make necessary behavioural and/or thought-level changes.
7. The counselling session(s) comes to an end once the Counselee feels that he/she has acquired new skills, which he/she can now employ in the real world to address real issues.

The above-mentioned counselling process is not a standard operating procedure. It is just a guideline to understand what normally goes inside a counselling room. Generally, most counselling sessions operate within certain ethical boundaries and the comfort level of the Counselee. Trained and experienced Counsellors know how to treat their clients with respect, empathy and confidentiality. After all, a counselling experience shouldn’t be a scary affair. It should be a life-transforming one!

*Note: The above process is very much applicable and beneficial even in a 1-1 online counselling session, where the Counsellor and the Counselee(s) can see each other face to face and are seated in a quiet and private space.